The only thing an old man can give me is a note from a younger man

My last boyfriend was 14 years younger than I and very, very cute. He played football for Texas A&M and had big muscles. We used to go hiking a lot on a trail known to have mountain lions.

Once while we were hiking, I heard a rustling in the brush above the trail. I jumped in front of my boyfriend, to save him from a possible lion attack. Turned out it was just a rabbit or deer, but he was very offended. "I can't believe you did that! You jumped right in front of me!" His manhood took a pounding.

I told my co-worker about the incident and he said, "Well of course you jumped in front of him, you were protecting your young!"