If you come in my cage I'll eat you too!

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

The left has seen the enemy and it is corn!

Forget for a minute the genetically engineered variety, which the left is terrified of. The left also fears beyond reason the toxic, high fructose corn syrup. The day after Thanksgiving, NPR listeners were treated to a cadre of "nutritional experts" who are universally obsessed with corn. American bodies are made up of corn, don't ya know. The Mexicans think that they are the "People of the corn" but they are not. North Americans are!

Corn is the epitome of all that is evil and Americans, being made up of corn, are evil too. Corn is de Debil! They want it declared illegal. They want it banned from our diet. They stay awake all night worried that somewhere, somewhere in America a child is partaking of the dreaded corn. God forbid that anyone should enjoy their food in the land of plenty. One must feel guilty. One must pay penance to the church of liberalism, which clearly states that no one ever should buy their child a Happy Meal.

PBS is running a public interest commercial that shows a family feeding their kid donuts and cookies, all day. The continuing refrain of this commercial is "It's just a donut!" But of course the moral of the story is, it isn't just a donut, its heart disease and type 2 diabetes. The left never would think of running a commercial suggesting that gay men's sexual habits are dangerous to their health. That would be interfering in people's personal business. But they sure do want to tell people how to feed their kids.

That PBS thinks anyone who feeds their children nothing but donuts and cookies all day is a watcher of PBS is laughable. The New Age missionaries are intent on spreading their puritanism across the globe. They know what's best for everyone else and they never tire of inventing faux catastrophes while ignoring the real dangers around them. They are not rational. The whole idea of personal responsibilty escapes them.

According to the left, the government is always responsible for the behavior of individual citizens. If citizens make bad decisions, it can be corrected only by government intervention. The corporations force us to eat packaged food. Their advertising brainwashes "stupid" average Americans into buying food that will eventually "kill" them. Government subsidies to corn farmers "force" people to eat Oreos and Hostess cupcakes made with high fructose corn syrup. So the government must "force" Americans to wean themslves from the corn syrup tit. It's all about the left getting our minds right.


At 11:33 AM , Anonymous jack said...

Hey ... I like oreos and cupcakes. I want my corn syrup tit! I must be a goner. I'm hooked ... can't give it up. Is there a CA 12 step program out there in Cali?

Infact I've never met a tit I didn't like!

At 12:12 PM , Blogger Miss Carnivorous said...

Tits are fun for me and for you!

At 7:29 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

So... can't I add corn grains to the saldas anymore? :(

At 12:16 PM , Blogger Miss Carnivorous said...

Blasphemer, do not speak the name of the unholy pee yellow grain!


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