Carnivorousness

If you come in my cage I'll eat you too!

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

My ex wants to sell carbon offsets.

Always thinking on his feet and just plain greedy, my ex, the taxidermist, has a great business plan. He lives in the woods, in Mariposa county, near Yosemite National Park. He says he will plant trees on his property for anyone who needs a carbon offset. Somebody tell Al Gore! Maybe my ex could use a sliding scale. The left should go for that one. He can charge rich bastards like Gore more than he charges small businessmen.

10 Comments:

At 1:18 PM , Anonymous jack said...

Me too. My bidness plan is even better.

I'm going to tell them I'll be planting trees ... but in the fine print say this will only be for million $ carpet footprints.

Don't you dare call me a scallywag or carpetbagger.

I'm a bidness man!

 
At 3:22 PM , Blogger Miss Carnivorous said...

Why the hell not? Except if you leave footprints on Mrs Jack's carpets she'll be madder than a water moccasin and twice as deadly!

 
At 10:45 AM , Blogger -bRad said...

An excellent idea. Most people don't realize that humans and animals have a near-0 net carbon effect as organisms.

might have to steal your idea, though. ;-)

 
At 8:52 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Laugh all you want, I just landed a business account in a very lucrative carbon offset program that will rake in around 10,000.00 a month for me........perhaps you should have kept the ex, he might be smarter than you think, after all, Richard Branson sells carbon offsets with his Virgin flights..... by the way, whats his address I can tell him how to market that.....for a fee.

 
At 10:07 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yes please let me know how to sell carbon credits to morons.

I have trees growning so fast I can't cut them down fast wnough to keep the fields clean. If some city slicker who beleives in this carbon non-sence system will pay me it would be great.

 
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