If you come in my cage I'll eat you too!

Monday, May 29, 2006

The Zionists are making me a heterosexual!

We used to have a library patron that would say, "The Jesuits are making me a lesbian" I figure it works both ways.

Saturday, May 27, 2006

Udderly delicious!

I was reading John Stossel's new book and he had a blurb about dog food companies. Stossel says that expensive dog food is not better for your dog. He said that the secret ingredient of dog food is cow udders. Dogs love the smelly parts of animals, such as, the lungs and udders. Stossel's experts say that they have to monkey around with the ingredient ratios so that pet owners are not offended by the smell of the dog food, but that dogs prefer the stinky food, paws down. I know this to be true. My dog once dragged me over a cliff to roll in a dead stingray!

Stamp out homelessness!

I have an idea for a program to help solve homelessness. You know all those guys that stand on the freeway entrances with, "Will work for money" signs? Well, I saw a story about a farmer that was saying that he couldn't get anyone but illegal immigrants to harvest his crops. My proposition is this. A one time expenditure will be utilized to send the inner city unemployed and homeless people to our nation's farms. It will be the reverse of what happened during the era of American industrialization. We will call it, "reverse industrialization." Each of the participants will be given a job working on a farm. If there are not enouigh homeless and unemployed Americans to fill all the needed positions, we will then hire guest workers, on an as needed basis and let immigrants into the country to fill only those jobs that can't be filled by Americans. All other programs for the homeless and unemployed will cease except for cases of disibility. Homeless American women with children will be expected to work, just as immigrant mothers with children do. Since we allow the teenage children of immigrants to harvest crops before school, we should allow American children to do so as well. It's kind of a tough love program, I know, making people actually do physical labor for their livelihood, but I think it could work!

Friday, May 26, 2006

Miss C's mistake!

Speaking of fishing tackle. Once, Miss C was fishing with her ex and a few of his friends. Miss C is very good at getting snagged on the bottom of rivers and lakes, and in overhead branches as she casts, etc. Miss C and her ex were fishing near a power plant in a pond. The fish were not at all edible. There were signs warning of mercury contamination, and pictographs of a man eating a whole fish that was speared on a fork, with a "no" circle and line over him, just to make sure that no one ate the contaminated fish. I think the pictograph is of a French man, he looks French to me, in the drawing. Of course, there were a lot of Asian immigrants fishing for food anyway. The warning was in many languages, but they were dismissive of such concerns. Miss C's boyfriend liked to go to the plant and catch and release, because the fish bit furiously and it was fun. Maybe the fish were biting because they had brain damage, or were just insanely, mutantly hungry, or both. While fishing, Miss C noticed that her hook was stuck on the bottom of the pond and she began to surreptitiously walk a little way up and down the bank, reeling in and out, and trying not to look as if she had a snag, because she didn't want to hear her boyfriend say, "Again!" So Miss C began to look as if she had a fish on her line and her boyfriend said, "Do you have a fish?" Miss C decided she had to come clean, "Ah, no," she said, "I have a big snatch!" Her boyfriend smiled and said , "No you don't honey, you have a cute little snatch!" And everyone on the bank of the river snickered and Miss C blushed.

Thursday, May 25, 2006

My Craigslist joke fell flat!

I put a joke ad into the W4M section of Craigslist. It read,

Wanted, old man with a weak ticker, one foot on a banana peel and the other in the grave.
Anna Nicole looking for her precious. Plusses for guys with boats and fishing tackle that works!

I thought that some guys would get the joke. They did not! Well, one did, but another one was very upset, and I got flagged so fast that my ad was taken down in less than an hour. Men are awfully sensitive.

Lilja 4-ever

This is a movie about the eastern European sex slave trade. I saw it last year and it pretty much told the same story as the Frontline program I described in my previous post. It's a beautiful movie, incredibly well acted, staring the little Russian girl from The Bourne Ultimatum, Oksana Akinshina. It is the single most depressing movie I have ever seen, but it tells an important story about what is happening to girls in the former Soviet countries. It also highlights the grinding poverty and social disintegration in the eastern bloc.

California campaign ads.

The Democratic plan for getting elected in California consists of television commercials in which candidates brag about their goals of taxing the rich and making corporations pay their "fair share" whatever that may be. What the Democrats are going to do with the money they take from the rich is another thing entirely. They will throw it at ineffective Government programs like public education. Once the Public Employee Unions figure out how much extra money the state has, they will start demanding raises and we will be back to square one with no measurable improvement whatsoever. 2 years ago my supervisors received a 26% raise. How many people in the private sector receive 26% raises?

Of course. the idea of taxing corporations and the rich will be popular with liberal Californians, so it's a done deal. I could say that I hope that the rich all leave California, but that would be cutting off my nose to spite my face. I live here too. If there's no one left but poor people, illegal immigrants, and Government employees, I'll be screwed.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Fred On Everything hits the nail on the head, go read him!

Fred talks about the national character of Mexico and Mexicans. As he lives in Mexico, and is married to a Mexican, I trust that his opinions are informed. I am pretty far right, but not on immigration and I have a lot of the same feelings about living among Latino immigrants as Fred does as an Anglo immigrant living in Mexico. I like Mexicans as a people, very much indeed. They are warm, friendly and family oriented. Nuff said, go read Fred!

Greatest post against Islamofascism in the history of blogging!

Jack at Infidel Blogger's Alliance has posted a biting, satirical, "What if other religions had Muslim values?" column. He should get some kind of award for this post. How about the "Best Fucking Post Ever Award!

PBS's Frontline program, "Sex Slaves"

While watching the horrific Frontline documentary on the sex slave trade last night, I was overwhelmed with sadness for the situation of women in the former Soviet Bloc countries. The estimate is that 500,000 girls a year are being trafficked into the sex slave trade. Mostly to Western European countries, the supposedly "enlightened" countries. There was one woman who forced into prostitution in Turkey. Back home in the Ukraine, her family lived on the outskirts of Chernobyl and suffered genetic damage as a result. She had a sister with a brain tumor that was so advanced that it was pushing out her eye and a brother that was dying of an abdominal disorder and needed surgery to save his life. She also had a daughter of her own to support. When the Ukrainian woman went to Turkey to take a job she was forced into prostitution, of course, I realize that many of these women know that this will happen, but they are truly desperate. The woman was pregnant when she left the Ukraine The woman was forced to have an abortion by her pimp. A sympathetic client helped her escape but because her brother needed his operation the woman eventually returned to Turkey to sell herself again, as it was the only way to earn the money to save her brother. Unfortunately she was picked up in a raid and sent home. Her brother died.

There was a Moldavan man in the documentary that was trying to get his wife back. A friend of theirs had lied and said that he would take her to Turkey and get cheap goods to sell in the woman's mother's store. When he got to Turkey he sold his friend's wife. Then he heard she had been resold to a particularly brutal pimp and felt guilty, so he called his friend and told him that he sold his wife. The wife was also pregnant at the time of her capture. These woman are sent to brothels all over the world, including the US. Women are suffering tortures of the damned, all over the world, every minute of the day and few people seem to care. It's because men are by nature programmed to think of women as a recepticle. Men must be controlled by societies. They must be taught to value women as human beings. Because we are pack animals we can do this, but it is a continual struggle against men's drives. Obviously European men present a facade of egalitarian values, but there is something dark and evil underneath the mask.

I am tired of the feminists in this country complaining about their pathetic and petty discomforts, abortion rights. and glass ceilings and sexual harassment and date rape on campus. What about forced abortions, where are the, Stop Forced Abortion campaigns? American feminists do not have any real understanding of how difficult it is for most women to survive in this world. As a Philipino Priest once said, "Female flesh is a commodity that never goes out of style." No matter how much the western feminists try to desexualize men, the fact remains the same. Women and especially young girls, are prey and must be protected. Prostitution will always be with us, but I would prefer an American "Mustang Ranch" style, voluntary force of professional escorts and prostitutes, to the involuntary "slave class" we have serving men now.

Great blog, check it out!

While site checking, I clicked on this blog, Don't Tell Me What's Wrong With Me, I Already Know. Very interesting, moderate Texan. I will be a regular reader of his blog from now on.

I know which ones I'd rather keep!

When I moved in with my ex-boyfriend, the taxidermist, he was concerned that my cats, Buster and Pandora, would scratch and shred his taxidermied animal trophies. He tried to convince me to have my cats declawed. I told him that I could never do this to my cats, that it was just too cruel. My ex said, "Well, you had Buster's balls cut off, if I had to choose between my balls and my nails, I know which ones I'd rather keep!" By the way my cats never did scratch his animals. Buster used to sit on the moose head between the antlers, but that's about as much attention they paid to the stuffed animals. They probably felt it was best to keep a low profile in that house. They could have gotten stuffed. They knew if it happened to bigger and smarter animals than they were, it could happen to any one. The neighbor kids called my ex's house, "The Dead Zoo."

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

How can you tell if you are in labor?

My ex-boyfriend's cousin had a beautiful wife that worked at a pregnancy clinic for low income women. I can not even begin to describe how beautiful this girl was, but she definitely was the most beautiful woman I have ever seen in real life. She managed the office for an obstetrician. One day a pregnant woman called in to the clinic and the office manager answered the phone. The woman on the line said that she was in labor. So the office manager asks, "How do you know that you are in labor?" The pregnant woman snaps back, "Cuz I got contraptions in my boogie hole!"

Testicles in strange places!

Riding the bus home from work last Friday, I became the unwitting eavesdropper of a very odd conversation. There were about 5, very loud teenagers, sitting at the rear of the bus, yelling and talking over each other. One of the boys said, "I used to think that my Adam's Apple was a third testicle in my throat, but now I don't think that no more!" One of the other boys piped up and said, "I do got 3. I do got one in my throat, most guys got 2, but I got 3." I was laughing to myself and yet quite horrified at the sorry state of the educational system.

Monday, May 22, 2006

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Sports Illustrated, no swimsuit edition.

My friend is a sports fanatic. He reads Sports Illustrated magazine religiously. When he got the swimsuit edition, I asked him how it was. He said, "Oh, I hate that edition!" Thinking that he wanted the magazine to stick strictly to sports reporting, I asked, "Really?" He said, "Yeah, they should take off those stupid suits!"

Sunday, May 21, 2006

It would be dangerous to release the prisoners of Guantanimo.

If there are over 700 prisoners at Guantanimo, and they are released and go back to fighting Afghani, Iraqi and American and international peacekeeping troops, they will likely be killed themselves. If they are not themselves killed, each released prisoner can kill dozens, if not hundreds of troops and innocent civilians. It's better to keep them in jail indefinitely than to release them into their societies to kill and maim. Al Qaeda has been stepping up attacks in Afghanistan. The last thing we need to do is add to their numbers.

Worst spam email of the week!

Hot latina wears diapers!
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Block of milk!

Miss C's co-worker grew up in a big Irish family. Miss C's co-worker's Grandmother was a very frugal person. The co-worker said that his Grandmother had a hardened block of powdered milk, ancient and repulsive. Whenever the Grandmother wanted milk for her tea or cereal, she would take out the glossy block and chip away at it. After getting a chunk off, she would reconstitute it in water. One day Miss C's co-worker saw his Grandmother grab the block and commence to chisel, he snatched the block away from in front of her and took it outside to the garbage can and threw it in. His Grandmother was yelling at him the whole time. He turned to her and said, "Grandma, if you want milk just tell me, and I'll go to the store and buy you some." She replied, "I don't need you to buy me milk, I have milk right here!"

Popcorn again!

My neighbor's 6 year old grandson knocked on my door. He asked what I was eating. I told him, "Popcorn." He said, "Popcorn again, why can't you eat right?"

Ann Coulter is a vicious she badger!

She is obviously cranky from hunger and lack of food.

Friday, May 19, 2006

I wonder who Ann Coulter thinks is washing her dishes,

at her favorite restaurants. That is if she eats. I ain't so sure. I do know that the people washing her dirty dishes are not British, Indian or European immigrants with engineering degrees. Ms Coulter wants only immigrants "better" than herself to be given preference for entry and citizenship. I've got news for her, there a lot of immigrants that are "better" than she is, already living and working in the US. I am not in favor of a Nazi eugenics style of nation building. We can't choose people based on their genetics. In fact, the US was formed from the riff raff and flotsom and jetsom of Europe. Greedy Spaniards and Anglos and Chinese, hungry for gold, formed the state that I live in. I think America needs immigrants that are survivors. Industrious people that will fight to protect their families. The only thing we have to do is keep these immigrants away from Liberals who will discourage them from learning English and encourage them to go on government assistance. My Uncle owned a pool business in California. He was learning Spanish so that he could talk to his Hispanic workers. I told him that he should encourage them to learn English. He said, "If they know English, they want more money." Precisely. I don't like Ann Coulter anymore, she shouldn't a, hadn't a, oughtn't a swang on Bush.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Ugly Democratic Gubernatorial race.

Phil Angelides and Steve Wesley are getting down and dirty. The Democrats have become so used to attacking the Republicans that they have become crazed and have now turned on each other. Someone should warn them that Arnold Schwarzenegger will only look good in comparison. I didn't think Arnold could win again, but now I am beginning to think he will win quite easily, after an ugly primary on the Democratic side determines which of the creeps he will run against.

Naked mermaids!

Yesterday Miss C stopped at the 99 cent store to buy some drinking glasses. Miss C spotted a resin mermaid figurine for 99 cents. Miss C loves the sea and mermaids and thought that the price was reasonable. As Miss C bought the half naked mermaid, she thought that it was very sad that the owner of the store would be jailed, or perhaps, even executed for selling the mermaid figurine, if he were still living in his country of birth, Afghanistan. As she watched the Afghani man handle the pretty little blonde half naked statue, she smiled to herself.

The teeth of my enemies!

When Miss C was in Hawaii, she visited the Bishop Museum. There she saw wonders from the South Pacific. There were great bowls, or calabashes, studded with human teeth. Molars inlaid in the wood of the bowls. These bowls were used by the Hawaiian kings. During feasts they would use the bowls for their refuse, bones and gristle and such. The king insulted his enemies every time he used the bowls. Miss Carnivorous wants bowls studded with the teeth of her enemies. Miss C also visited the Polynesian Cultural Center. At the Polynesian Cultural center there was an artist from New Zealand. He had a number of beautiful weapons, war clubs, studded with shark teeth. Miss C loves sharks very much and found these weapons fascinating. The artist came over and said, "These are for the breaking of bones and the tearing of flesh!" Miss C got shivers down her spine. Miss C is regretably blood thirsty.

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Stickers and an icecream cone!

I was sitting in the pharmacy at the hospital waiting to get a prescription filled for antibiotics for a kidney infection. I was all by myself and feeling very feverish and depressed. There was a cute little girl in the pharmacy waiting area with her mom. The mom took some stickers out of her purse and gave them to the little girl. She asked the little girl if she wanted the stickers stuck onto her dress. The little girl said, "Yes," and her mom put the stickers all over the girl's dress. Then she said, "After we get your prescription I'll take you to get an icecream cone." I looked at a woman sitting across from me and said, "I want someone to put stickers on my dress, and take me out for an icecream cone." The woman smiled at me, and said, "I'll take you out for an icecream cone."

Our Jolly Pirate Crew!

The right wing co-worker and I, oppressing the minorities! We're keeping them down!

Here chick, chick, chick.

My ex boyfriend was telling me about his friend who has a chicken ranch in Zambia. He said that she uses every part of the chickens except for the feathers. She packages up the feet and heads and calls them "Walky Talkies." She also packages heads and guts together and calls them "Smarts and Parts."

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Devil Dog, hound from hell!

Are Americans planting "negative" news stories in American newspapers?

Our newspapers just can't get enough of the negativity! They want to make sure that everybody knows that the world is a swirling cesspool of gloom and doom.

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Monday, May 15, 2006

Envy is a bitch.

I was reading a left wing blogger's column about school vouchers and one of the commenters pointed out that rich people might use the vouchers, and this wouldn't be fair, and that their kids could go to really great schools, etc, etc. Whine, bitch, moan. Damn people even before they've commited an offense. I know a lot of poor people that cheat and send their kids to schools in other districts and lie about their address to get a better education for their kids. My dad did that for me for a while until I got caught. I wasn't a good enough liar.

I am not sure how good schools can get, there is probably a finite limit, and then there is also a natural limit to how much a kid can learn, due to his own mental capacities, or lack thereof. I don't think this would create a race of rich, super kids. I mean, Paris Hilton obviously went to the best schools, and sweet though the dear girl is, she isn't the brightest bulb in the chandelier. She has other natural "talents" that some poor girls share too.

So, anyway, to get to my point, it seems to me that the major problem in this world is that people spend an inordinant amount of time worrying that someone else might get something that they themselves wont get. They do this even if they don't really want what the other person is getting. I have noticed this around my office where when one person gets a footstool, suddenly everyone else is up in arms and they whine til they get one, and a week later there are 20 footstools in the closet cause it's hard to work with your feet up on one. They stuck me in a cubicle against my will, kicking and screaming and using all the Liberal victim mentality I could fake. I went to the employee counseler and tried to make it seem as if it was bad for my mental and physical health.

You can see from the pic below I had a great window seat. Other than watching the homeless defecate outside the window periodically, I had a great gig going. Some people that were antisocial wanted cubicles and got them. Jealous people started bitching that they wanted one too, and that they never give us anything nice, and as a consequence my ass is stuck looking at grey cubicle walls all day.

I think that if they invented a drug that eliminated envy, it might be a good thing. It's no skin off my back if rich people use a voucher. People should stop caring so much about what other people do. If they enjoy high fat food let them eat it, it's a sensual pleasure, let them have it. If they have a lot of money let them spend it. I remember when some female tennis players were jealous of the money Anna Kournikova made from her looks and Martina Navrotilova said, "The money is there for her, it's not there for you!"

I read a great journal of a man that came to California by wagon train, The Journals and Drawings of J. Goldsborough Bruff. The book was recommended reading by Theodora Kroeber in her book Ishi. She said if you wanted to understand the hardened mentality of some of the people that came over in the wagon trains, Bruff's journal was great reading. Mr Bruff said that one Scandinavian guy couldn't carry his tools through the Sierra's, and rather than leaving them for others he smashed them to pieces. Mr Bruff asked him why was doing that and he replied, "Because if I can't use them, then nobody else is going to have the use of them either!" Human beings are strange. Be happy for other people and worry about your own damn self. As Tevya said in Fiddler on the Roof, "It's no shame to be poor, but it's no great honor either!"

President Bush's speech was beautiful Baby!

I just want to kiss him ! But Laura would run me over! Whoops, sick joke!

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Sunday, May 14, 2006

New Spermamax email!

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The Staircase

I just finshed watching an 8 part series from the Sundance Documentary Collection, The Staircase. It involved the trial of a man accused of killing his wife, who I believe, fell down the stairs while drunk. I remember how bruised up my sister would get after a drunken night. She was always falling and covered with bruises the next day. I've seen people get horribly wounded while drunk, so it's not a stretch for me to think that someone could fall down the stairs and die from loss of blood after sustaining such wounds.

The trial was in Durham North Carolina and the DA that is trying the Duke lacrosse, rape case was involved slightly in this trial. He came across as a major slime ball. He seemed inordinately happy that the DA decided to file charges against the man, grinning his fool ass off at the thought of it. He is a bad, bad man. During the trial it came out that the accused was bi-sexual, truly bisexual. Throughout the suspect's 2 marriages, he would meet men and have sex with them. He claimed that this was with his wife's knowledge and approval. Probably one of the most charming witnesses I have ever seen in a televised trial, was a young ex-soldier, now escort, that the suspect had contacted on the internet while looking for a sexual encounter. He was very smart and very funny.

Just to show you that Miss C can learn somethng new, Miss C will say, that as she watched this documentary, she saw much predjudice and hatred and juvenile behavior from the citizenry and authorities of Durham, North Carolina regarding homosexuality. Miss C forgets that she lives in the big city and that not all places are like Miss C's big city. She needs to be reminded of that from time to time. Miss C is sort of an enlightened conservative and perhaps gives too much credit to others. I don't feel that the suspect got a fair trial. I feel he was found guilty by reason of homosexuality.

It was hard watching the defense attorney, Jewish and from NY and knowing that he felt, wrongly, like most liberals, that the jury was on his wave length. He was brilliant and his defense was masterful The problem was, once the gay aspect had been revealed, the jury had made up its mind to convict an innocent man. He really had no reason to kill his wife as he had been having sexual encounters all along. The Durham police were unsophisticated in their forensic analysis. The whole trial was very frustrating for me to watch. There were a lot of twists and turns and strange coincidences, and it was fascinating. The Jewish attorney even had to go to Germany to interview the suspect's ex wife. Poor guy had to watch a German parade. If any one has the time to watch this documantary, I highly recommend it.

Saturday, May 13, 2006

Juan Cole's erotic obsession with Islamic culture.

The Arab culture and history professor, Juan Cole could not be more gay. He is erotically obsessed with Islamic culture. He likes the idea of a culture where women are restricted from public life and men are forced to look to each other for sexual relief and deep friendship. I can guarantee, that if you take any professor specializing in a culture not his own, and he is straight, he will be married to a woman from that culture. Juan Cole wants middle eastern men in a big red throbbing way. I have my suspicions about Stephen Zunes as well. It's hard to be sure, as his Tourette's interferes with his gestures, making it hard to determine the extent of his feminine mannerisms. Juan was the first to come out and say that Ayatollah Ali Sistani was not advocating the death penalty for gays even though he clearly was. He claims that Islam has created a place for "homosociality," like no other religion has! That makes Islam great for gays, whoo hoo! Right up his back alley! A subject near and dear to Juan's heart, oops, I mean prostate! Juan Cole reminds me of the old British writers, like Paul Bowles, for instance, that used to spend months in Morrocco and take advantage of the poverty there and use young Morroccan men for sexual purposes. I was reading a biography the other day and one of the writers wrote to Bowles and complained of the brutality of the Morroccans, while lauding their good looks. This author said he was happier in Spain where the young men looked Arab, but were European in nature. Bowles replied that he liked the Arabs the way they were. I think Juan Cole shares the natures of these men. Juan Cole's view of Islam is warped by his sexual attraction to Muslim men. If he was sexually attracted to Jewish men, he would be arguing from the other side of the fence.

Let's just give the California High School Exit Exam to students in kindergarten!

Of course they'll fail it, but why wait? They are going to get diplomas anyway. Shouldn't we, as taxpayers expect accountability from our educational system? California kids are not being taught the information they need to pass the California High School Exit Exam. When will anyone become indignant on the taxpayers' behalf? Everyone is angry over high gas prices, but at least gas does its job. What if we paid high gas prices and our cars wouldn't start. There would be riots. Inner city school teachers are constantly demanding pay raises. For what? For failing to impart the most basic of information necessary to be successful in society, that's what. They have 12 years to do this in. Colleges and trade schools do it in 2 or 4. I am a victim of inner city schools and I know what I am talking about.

I saw State Attorney General Arturo Gonzalez on the news, claiming that students shouldn't have to analyze poetry, because that's too much to expect from minority students. Sounds racist. I guess those students won't be devouring Isabelle Allende books like my educated Hispanic co-workers do. Arturo Gonzalez and his band of Democrats don't think it's necessary for California minority students to have basic knowledge of anything important. In fact the Democrats rely on keeping ignorant people, ignorant, in order to keep their voting base.

The Democrats are worried about the "feelings" of students that did not pass the exit exam. Well, those students are going to have bad "feelings" again when they try to get into nursing school and can't pass the exacting courses needed to graduate. Or maybe Mr Gonzalez wants his chemo therapy administered by a nurse that couldn't pass the nursing exam, but was allowed to graduate anyway. Mr Gonzalez is dooming another generation of California minority kids to the streets and low wages. Perhaps we should send the kids to boarding school in Mexico, where they will get a better education for a lot less money and probably learn English, as well.

Friday, May 12, 2006

Cuz I'm a retard!

I told my right wing co-worker that when anyone asks us why we support Bush and the Iraq war, we should just say, "It's cuz we're retards!" That will help avoid any confusion and make them feel guilty for picking on the handicapped. Guilt tripping is what liberals love to do, more than anything. Our goal is to spread joy and happiness wherever we go! I bet the first liberal we say it to will apologise.

My co-workers were talking about American Idol today,

and that top model show. I told them that left wing bloggers despise those shows and are full of opinions about the stupidity of those that enjoy such poisonous television faire. I told them that the leftists think that watching such shows, combined with the soap operas my friends also enjoy, signifies that the watcher is of low IQ. My friends were shocked. Of course they are Black and many, many Black people love American Idol and watch soap operas religiously. I told them that they were despised by white liberals for eating at MacDonald's. I then went a step further and said, "Besides, you all shop at Walmart and that means you are very bad, very stupid people, in fact some leftists think that you deserve the death penalty for shopping at Walmart!" "What's more, you are born again Christians, every last one of you, a capitol crime, indeed!" I can tell you, I made sure that white liberals earned no points with my Black friends today.

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Sometimes when you fight the Devil, you gotta jab him with his own pitchfork!

The Democrats are getting wound up to complain long and loud about a program that is popular with the American people. Polls show that the majority of Americans are ok with the phone companies turning over phone records to the Government. The Democrats are going to wail and moan and demand investigations, as usual, on and on ad infinitum. That is pretty much all they have done for the last 4 years, demand investigations into this and into that. We don't need an investigation, we know what happened. The government, excoriated by the 9/11 commision for derelection of duty, tried to do the right thing by requesting call records. There, now we don't need an investigation any more. Everybody feels safer knowing that big brother is watching out for us. No one feels safer knowing that the Democrats are determined to expose every last intelligence strategy the Bush administration has developed for watching terrorist cells in the US and abroad. Like an ex CIA agent once said, "We are always engaged in illegal activity, we go into other countries and break their laws and spy on them, our job, by its very nature is illegal"

Thursday, May 11, 2006

Let's make a deal!

Let President Bush fight the war on terror in any way he sees fit. Anything goes and and all's fair. Let the Democrats fight the war on hunger and poverty. Anything goes and all's fair. We will see who wins which war first.

No good deed goes unpunished!

A woman moved into the cottage next door to me. She moved here from Miami. She put in a forwarding address for the wrong address. The forwarding address she used is my address. She set up her cell phone account with my address and I get that bill too. It's been over six months and I have been getting a lot of her mail. I take it to her mail box every day. I thought that she would figure out she was using the wrong address and correct the problem,. No dice. I finally put a note on a bundle of mail and told her that she should change the address to the correct one. So today my neighbor and I get home at the same time. I have not talked with her directly as we are both busy and never see each other. I hear her checking her mailbox. I know I have her mail so I grab it and run over to her and tell her I have it. She begins to tell me of all the things she has done to correct the problem. She says she is getting most of her mail, etc, etc. I tell her I am returning her mail daily and her box is always empty. Then she gets a tone and starts telling me I can just send the mail back, if I want to. Right, I am thinking, send it back every day, it's easier to walk it over to her house. So I walk back to my house thinking, what an ungrateful bitch! I can't win for losing.

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Bath tissue!

When I was 7 I used to play with a little girl from Tennessee. I always noticed that at her house the bath tub was full of dirty clothes. I used to wonder how they took baths. Once, while playing at her house, I had to use the toilet. As I was sitting on the pot, I noticed that there wasn't any toilet tissue. I yelled out, "Melanie, there's no toilet paper!" Melanie yelled back, "Just wipe with the dirty clothes, that's what we do!"

Journalist exchange program

In order to avoid seeing irritating headlines everytime I pass a news stand, such as "Hu's the Boss" and "Iran's President lectures Bush," I propose an educational program. I will call it "Journalist Exchange Program." We will trade left wing bloggers and journalists working for major US newspapers in exchange for imprisoned bloggers (in actuality left wing in their culture) and journalists in Islamic countries. I feel that our journalists need to walk a mile (around and around in their cells, between torture sessions) in the shoes of journalists who ply their trade in countries where it is threatening to life and limb to do so. Most probably the American people will prefer the more humble and modest foreign journalists. As the foreign journalists report on the sad stories of steroid scandals and wiretapping of their enemies in the US, they will come to appreciate America very much and will want to stay. They, having a real idea of suffering and torture, will be able to make an objective judgement about the actual importance, or lack of importance of the stories they are reporting on. We will leave the American journalists to rot in the Islamic countries. Maybe they will be released by the Jihadis and paraded around as a symbol of the good will the Islamists have for journalists. Then they can all get jobs with al Jazeera.

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Best email of the day!

"You always wanted to use your penis as a billiards cue!"

Is this a secret desire shared by many men?

California Republican Party is chapping my hide!

Marketers for the California Republican Party were calling me at work a few times a week. I told them over and over again that I did not want to receive calls asking for donations while I was at work. The marketers would get very rude with me. One tricky bastard called and asked if my credit card information was the same as it was the last time I made a donation. I told him I could not talk to him at work and hung up. When I checked my credit card statement he had gone ahead and made an unauthorized charge on my card. The party needs to get different marketers. They are not getting a red cent from me until they do.

Monday, May 08, 2006

Kewns in my garbage can!

Every spring a mother raccoon and her 4 cubs come into the yard and go through my garbage and drag it all over the place. Eating and snuffling and making those high pitched raccoon sounds. I am typing in the chat room and I hear the raccoons outside so I type, "Coons are in my garbage!" Boom, I get kicked out for racist language. After I chased the raccoon family away, I had to come back in and type kewn, instead of coon.

American celebrities are amazingly good looking!

I was looking at a book at work the other day. Celebrity Style, or some such thing. One thing is for sure, American celebrities are stunningly attractive. Jessica Simpson, Lindsay Lohan, Hallie Berry, Kirsten Dunst, Hillary Duff, Beyonce, Jennifer Lopez, all beautiful, gorgeous creatures. European actresses are not nearly as beautiful as ours are. Of course, our actresses can't act their way out of a paper bag with an Indian guide, but they are incredibly lovely.

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Favorite spam of the week...

Bring your spermatozoids to life with Spermamax ! Of course we know from a previous spam that those lively spermatozoids will be forcefully expelled in copious, bison sized amounts. What a product, if I wasn't a girl, I'd order me some today, because the voice in my penis would tell me to.

Flight 93

I just saw Flight 93. My Palestinian-American friend took me to see it. My friend was in Amman Jordan, during the wedding bombing and was staying in the hotel that was bombed. He travels back and forth to the Middle East a lot for business. He took a lot of pictures of the bombing debris and the protests afterwards.

My friend said that he remembered bursting into tears when he saw the twin towers go down. He knew that the police and firefighters were still in the towers and he was overwhelmed with grief. On his way home from a training seminar for work on Sept 11, he saw an SUV pulled over to the side of the road and some guy was holding up a sign that said "Kill All the Arabs," and people in cars were honking in agreement. He said he just didn't know what to think and he was very scared. He has been in the US navy and is very moderate, very educated. His father loved this country and so does my friend. It's been a rough few years for him.

So he calls me and asks if I want to see the movie and I say yes and he jokes, "Gotta go see my people!" The movie is a masterpeice on many levels. It's beautifully acted and directed. My friend said during the film that he recognized everyone, they all looked familiar. After the movie, I told him that I think the casting director picked people that looked like people everyone knew, so that we would feel in sympathy with them. The actor that played Mark Bingham, the gay rugby player from San Francisco, really became him for me. The actress that played the pretty blonde stewardess deserves an Oscar. Some of the air traffic controllers and ground people were playing themselves, I don't know how they did it, but it was brilliant. It was incredibly moving to see everyone working behind the scenes, scrambling around, trying to make sense out of the crazy stuff that was happening. No one was quite sure what was going on, their brains just couldn't process this war crime happening on US soil. The magnitude of the success of that attack, just boggles the mind. I remember my Iranian boyfriend telling me during the Reagan years that no one would ever attack the US. Those days are gone. I got very nauseated during the movie and had to do deep breathing exercises to keep my lunch down, I don't know if it was due to the dizzying camera work or the emotional impact. There was a group of leftist women in the audience that laughed through the whole movie, any time President Bush or Vice-President Cheney was mentioned they went into peals of laughter. My friend and I laughed evey time they showed the one European/Scandinavian(?) passenger, so intent was he on going along with the terrorists, so I guess we can't complain.

My friend did note the odd casting for the Arab parts, as the actors that played the hijackers were very light skinned and handsome. I said I thought that that was intended to avoid stereotyping. We both agreed that the actors they usually get to play Arabs in movies are Pakistani and look totally different from most Arabs, who look different from each other depending on the region they come from. One of the actors portraying a terrorist looked very Jewish, in fact. I have no complaints about the soft focus on the terrorists leading up to the hijacking, it didn't seem apologetic to me. Those men believed in what they were doing, there is no getting around that. They had the strength of their faith and convictions. So do men that kill abortion providers for that matter. I was happy as hell when the passengers opened up on the terrorists and started beating them to death. I have to admit, I didn't ask my friend what he thought about that part.

Eighth Grade education in Mexico!

Check out Fred's column on the relative difficulty of the curriculum in Mexican schools compared to the poor education we receive in American inner city schools. Ouch!!! Biting commentary, from someone with big teeth, and big cojones! I like the part about Harriet Tubman! I went through the inner city school system and I can vouch for the those on this side of the fence! Our educational system is run by idiots content to churn out more idiots. The teachers, counselors and adminstrators in the American school system are overly concerned with childrens feelings and not very concerned with imparting important information about the larger world. In fact, the main protest against the No Child Left Behind act is that the teachers feel it concentrates on the rote memorization of "facts." So you see they are arguing against the "facts, and the memorization of them. Of course we all become forgetful, eventually, but I fail to see how knowing more "facts" can be harmful. The teachers don't like facts at all. Facts interfere with "feelings" which are of paramount importance to the New Age Missionaries that call themselves teachers. I have always thought that teaching kids about their own cultures was a stupid idea, anyway. They already know about their cultures and can learn it far better from relatives at home than they can from their teachers. It might help if they could find their asses on a map though! If the left could find Israel on a map and see how tiny it is.... maybe.....Well, never mind, that's just wishful thinking!

Saturday, May 06, 2006

They don't roll out the red carpet for just anyone!

I had to leave work early on Friday. I saw by my e-mail that UPS had left a table I had bought on my front porch. I had searched the internet for days looking for a table small enough to fit in my tiny house and I paid a lot of money for it and didn't want anyone to take it. I had to catch the bus home so I left in a hurry. I get on the bus and I see a tall skinny Black guy at the back of the bus standing there talking and at first I think he's talking to someone else on the bus. He's complaining loudly, "They put up the ropes and they rolled out the red carpet!" "They do that for white people." "James Brown came here, they didn't do that for James Brown!" "They didn't roll out no red carpet, they didn't put up no ropes for James Brown!" "That's cuz he Black!" " I think I want some fish!" "I want me some fish." "Bus driver, let me off this bus, I want some fish!" "They shouldn't do that for white people, they ain't no different from us!"

One bleeding heart liberal can spoil the whole bunch, girl!

I bought my tiny house from a guy whose mother and father had lived across from each other in a cottage court. There are 16 cottages, four rows of 4, facing each other. 20 ft from each other's front door and 10 ft away from each other's side windows. The realtor that the guy used was a nice lady. The realtor's husband's parents had lived in the court as well and had been friends with the guy and his parents. The realtor was very nice and treated me very well during the sale and after, even though she was not my realtor, but his. Maybe she is too nice. Her husband has Parkinson's disease. He is an artist and had planned on using the cottage, which he had inherited from his parents, for an art studio. As his Parkinson's progressed, he decided that he would rent the cottage out to a lower income person. As he himself was suffering from a disability, he wanted to rent to another person with a disability. Fine and good. When I moved in there was a guy living there that needed a liver transplant. He took care of a friend's kids during the day and after school. I never saw the father of the kids because he lived with his mother a few blocks away. She worked, but he was incapable of taking care of his own kids because he was an alcohol and drug addict. Then his mother died. The kids got sent off to foster care and the drunk guy moved in with my neighbor. My neighbor, who shouldn't be drinking or doing drugs because his liver is gone, started doing both, because his friend was around him doing it. He also missed his friend's kids and his friend's mother who he had been in love with at one time. Then the assaults and fighting started. The guy that needs a transplant got stabbed. We can hear the drunk guy screaming and jumping on the other guy in his bed at night. They are both on public assistance. The drunk one is always lurking in wait for the mailman. A firetruck is in front of our houses a couple times a month to revive one or the other, or to take one of them off to the hospital. The drunken one walks around with his pants off in front of us and the neighbors kids. He pisses on the neighbors trees. He pukes all over the yard. He comes back at 2:30 in the morning and climbs in his window, waking us all up with his banging and cursing and falling. He comes out at 3:00 am to dump his bottles in the trash, dropping and breaking them all over the sidewalks. They have a pit bull that runs all over the yards, and out into traffic on our busy street, because they never put him on a leash. They never clean up its poop. The realtor feels sorry for these guys, and her husband keeps the rent impossibly low so that they can afford it. We all wish they'd raise it out of his price range. They won't let her have any work done on the house because they don't want anyone to see that they've trashed it. I really am for mixing the lower class into regular working class neighborhoods and not concentrating them all in low income neighborhoods. Low income people are not criminals and it's not fair that they have to live among criminals, unprotected. The difference is that low income people are often on Welfare and can sleep all day, while working people have to get up and go to work after a night of disturbance by rowdy neighbors. If she kicked them out, they'd just move on to torment other tenants elsewhere.

Stump the chump!

My right wing co-worker and I decided to have a Cinco de Mayo bash at work. We made a lot of Mexican food and invited everyone to bring potluck. We realized a little late that we were out of party supplies. We scavenged for tablecloths and we could only find a yellow one. One of our co-workers that never parties with us, because he is a Jehovah's Witness, comes over to check out the party decorating progress and I say, "We have a yellow table cloth to symbolize the cowardly French, we hate the French!" He looks at me for a minute and says, "Who do you like?"

Friday, May 05, 2006

Scary incident!

I was leaving work yesterday and a scary thing happened to me. I was crossing the street and a guy was stopped at the light I was waiting for. He was across the street from me. He was driving a tiny foreign car, very old and beat up and had all his windows open and rap music blasting. The light turns green and I step off and he drives past me going the other way. I can hear him yelling over the music but I think he is singing or talking to someone in the car with him. Then he honks and I never look at guys that honk at me. I continue across and I get to the other side and he turns down a one way street, driving in the wrong direction, and follows me. He drives along with me, yelling stuff I can't even understand. I still think he is yelling at someone in the car because I haven't looked at him. I walk another block and he follows me the whole way. Then he turns in front of me makes a u-turn and speeds past me down the driveway of a cleaners that runs parallel to the street. As he zooms past me I see it's just him in the car. I can see he's got a do-rag on and is probably yelling at me. I am still trying to ignore him because he is obviously crazy. He makes another u-turn and comes back up along side of me, yelling the whole time. All the people walking near me look back at me and look at the guy. I ask this other guy, "Is he yelling at me?" The guy says, "Yes, you have an admirer." As I talk to this guy, the guy in the car slows down next to us and yells, "I am going to fuck you up, bitch," and peels out and takes off. I tell the other guy that he seems to have gone past admiration. He was pissed because I wouldn't look at him. This kind of stuff used to happen to me all the time when I was younger. Now that I am in my 40's, I still have admirers but they are not usually this intense.

Thursday, May 04, 2006

The left thinks soccer moms deserve the death penalty!

I see that one leftist, at least, thinks that listening to (I admit to some sympathy with this one) Phil Collins, shopping at Walmart, or being a soccer mom are worthy of the death penalty. Being and doing all three must be the liberal equivalent of the Three Strikes Law. Anyway, I found Karl's blog pretty funny and am linking it. His karate chop, slot machine column was great. Here is the offending comment;

Post a Comment On: I Can't Be The Only One Who Feels This Way
"Phil Colins the Anti Music"

Howard Davis said...

You are so right. I'd take it a step further -- all Phil Collins fans should be killed. Just stake out a Walmart and wait until some 40 year old soccer mom comes out with her new "Sususudio" CD and just take her out. I'll help.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Miss Carnivorous and her right wing habits.

Miss Carnivorous gets accused of engaging in many bad habits. This is stereotyping. Miss Carnivorous knows that there are no stereotypes that are not generally true, but since the left wing proclaims itself to be against stereotyping, they should be made aware that they are doing it. Miss Carnivorous will now bore many people, but she is going to paint a picture of her life and habits, to clear up any misconceptions that leftists might have about Conservatives and to avoid having to continually rebut statements made by silly people in her comment section.

Miss C lives in a 420sq ft cottage. She pays a mortgage on this cottage. It has 120 volts of electricity furnished by two, 60 volt fuse boxes. When Miss C has to turn on the microwave to cook her broccoli, she must first turn off all other appliances, especially the radio, before turning on the microwave. She often has to go outside to flip the circuit breaker the electrician installed next to the glass fuses, so Miss C no longer has to change fuses in the rain. Miss C recycles in everyway possible.

Miss C does not drive and has never driven. Miss C's mother could not afford a car and did not learn to drive intil she was 48. She did not drive well. Miss C is too old to learn to drive well, so she will never learn. She can not afford a car anyway. Miss C takes the bus. Miss C walks a lot and hiking is her favorite activity.

Miss C drinks coffee, a lot of coffee. Most days, Miss C drinks Yuban or Folger's coffee. Miss C went fishing with her dad a lot and drank a lot of truckstop coffee. Miss C is not a coffee snob. Once in a while some nice person will give Miss C a Starbuck's giftcard. Miss C has a few of them, barely used. When she does go to Starbuck's she orders a large house coffee, using just that terminology. Miss C drinks coffee strictly for the caffeine, it enables her to work very fast. Miss C is the fastest worker in her job class, hands down.

Miss C eats sandwiches for lunch most days. Miss C's co-workers are disappointed by Miss C's boring lunch choices, as there are many good restaurants around our place of work. Many of Miss C's co-workers are fat. Miss C does not want to be fat. Miss C thinks that sandwiches were good enough for her when she was a girl and they are good enough for her now. Miss C spends about $5.00 for lunch. Miss C does drink diet 7up with her lunch. She has peanuts or Sunchips as a side dish.

Miss C. does not snack much at all. Sometimes she chews sugarless gum. Wintergreen is her favorite, cinnamon her next. Miss C has had Ho ho's, Ding dong's, Twinkie's Hostess Pies and Cup Cake's but they are not regular faire. She has never had a Big Gulp. Miss C has had a Slurpee. After a 10 mile hike, a Slurpee tastes like ambrosia. Miss C fails to see the evil in partaking of these foodstuffs, but if someone can convince her that they are harmful to herself or others, she promises to give them up. Miss C works with many vegetarians and most of them are fat! Miss C prefers to eat tofu(Miss C calls it dofu, Miss C also says gung fu instead of kung fu) when it is fried in a meat dish. Miss C shops in Chinatown or at the Korean grocery for her dinner. Miss C can cook anything. Carnitas are her favorite food. Miss C received a lot of recipes from a Mexican co-worker when another co-worker's daughter got married. The Mexican co-worker wrote down her recipes for the new bride and she knew that Miss C loved to cook and that she loved Mexican food, so she gave Miss C copies of the recipes as well. Miss C loves pork and eats a lot of lemongrass porkchops from the Vietnamese restaurant around the corner from her house. Miss C cooks a lot of roast chicken and game hens. Miss C has a rice cooker and her Chinese-American punk rocker friend brings Miss C giant bags of Jasmine rice. Miss C cooks a lot of rice Miss C bakes cookies and cakes, but rarely, because her co-workers are, as mentioned before, fat and she does not want to add to their problems. They are all on blood pressure and anti cholesterol drugs. Miss C does not want to kill them.

When Miss C gets home she watches the CBS evening news, she can barely stand it due to it's liberal bias and Bob Shieffer's terrible performance as anchor, but she forces herself to watch.. She can barely see it as she has no reception from her roof antenna. At 6:00 she turns it to The News Hour. She can barely see that as well, but likes it very much. She then watches The Nightly Business report, although she has no money to invest, she finds it a little interesting. On Wednesday she watches an art show about local artists. She and her co-worker, a Black guy from Philly, who is into photography, are the only 2 people that watch this art show and she and he discuss it every week. She and he also watch, on Thursdays, a show about local restaurants which they also discuss. Miss C watches Frontline and Masterpiece Theatre. Miss C's co-worker, the blood thirsty Chinese-American punk rocker who loves Tom Waits, tapes boxing for Miss C. Miss C loves boxing. Same co-worker taped Rome for Miss C but she got bored with it. Miss C is easily disenchanted and bored by things and people, unfortunately. Miss C's other co-worker tapes Deadwood. Miss C. loves Deadwood. Miss C used to watch Cold Case for a while, because she likes the gimmick of bringing the dead back as young people and reuniting everyone. This works for her. Places in the Heart is one of her favorite movies of all time and when all the dead meet the living in the church in the end, Miss C gets very choked up. But Miss C got bored with Cold Case. She watches a lot of movies, mostly foreign and indie. She has seen a lot of Japanese movies. Some of them are very strange, like Visitor Q. Too much squirting breast milk and necrophilia for Miss C, but she found it interesting. She very much liked Audition. Miss C loves movies from Australia and New Zealand. Miss C loves Tsui Hark movies, The Blade is her favorite Tsui Hark movie. She also loves Dragon Inn.

Miss C listens to NPR. Miss C loves Cartalk, even though she doesn't have a car. She likes it so much, she will listen to the repeat show on Saturday. Miss C hates Prairie Home Companion, although they do have great guests some times, like Billy Joe Shaver. Miss C loves This American Life. She listens to the BBC World news. Miss C can not stand Rush Limbaugh or Michael Savage. She finds them offensive. Rush is, however, a million times more intelligant than Michael.

Miss C loves the Raiders. Miss C watches the Olympics religiously. Miss C hates the Olympic's opening and closing ceremonies, they embarrass her. Miss C also hates Cirque du Soleil.

Miss C was a skatepunk. Miss C listened to early classic punk. She used to dress New Wave. Miss C loves music and can enjoy most. She likes rap, she likes latin, she likes reggae. She likes heavy metal and punk. She likes classical. Miss C loves world music. She loves the blues. Miss C's blog address is pigmeat, this is the title of a Leadbelly song. Pigmeat is a euphemism. Miss C will not say what for, look it up. Miss C loves all the blind, blues singers that ever lived. Miss C does not think that white people should attempt to play blues. She loves Eric Clapton, but not when he is attempting to play the blues, then she is embarrassed for him. Miss C hates Bonnie Raitt and thinks she is boring.

Miss C reads everything she can get her hands on. Every type of book. Every type of magazine. Miss C can not get to bed at night because she would rather read all night. Miss C is addicted to blogs. She thinks that they are marvelous, splendiferous things. Real people writing about their feelings and lives. Her mind is boggled by the wonderfulness of them all and can't stop reading them. Her special favorite is Leilouta. Miss C does crossword puzzles every night as well. Miss C is slow at the New York times crossword puzzle. Crossword puzzles are meditation for Miss C.

Miss C used to scuba dive, but has not taken a vacation since she bought a house. Miss C loves Hawaii, very much.

Miss C has a dog, but is not a dog person. She had 2 cats that died at the ages of 17 and 18. She misses them but likes the clean house. She wishes sometimes that she did not have a dog.

Miss C was raised in the ghetto and lives around many people of many races and cultures. Miss C has friends from every race and culture. Miss C is very good at languages. She reads some Italian and French and speaks and reads Spanish and a little Arabic. Miss C makes $1,000 above the poverty level.

Miss C is not a member of the KKK or an admirer of David Duke. Miss C likes Jews. Miss C likes them despite the fact that they are very Liberal. They are liberal and intelligent, which Miss C can accept. Miss C finds the philosophy of the modern non Jewish left to be very anti-semitic. Miss C finds this attitude to be wholly unacceptable.

Miss C hopes that this prevents silly comments but knows that this is wishful thinking, so she will refer people to this column instead of addressing silly and untrue statements directly. Miss C is bored by silly statements.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Bush is strangling me!

The other day I was walking to the bus stop after work and there is a guy walking in front of me. He is walking crab like, sideways and with a hitch in his git along. He walks up to 2 guys and says, "Bush is strangling me!" The 2 guys laugh and say, "Your President is strangling you?" And the crazy guy, very offended, says, "He ain't my President, he's strangling me!"

Monday, May 01, 2006

Medusa strikes!

I was walking my dog at the park. My dog is prone to chasing squirrels. He sees a squirrel and chases it. He drags me head first into a tree with low hanging branches. I try to move and I realize my hair is stuck in the tree foliage. I struggle, as my dog pulls me deeper into the tree and gets me even more entangled. Two cute little girls come running up and ask if they can pet my dog. Part of the reason I am stuck is that I can't let go of my little monster of a dog. "No," I said, "he's not a good dog." I was a little panicky at this point, afraid that my dog would bite them. One of the girls says. "Are you stuck?" I say, "Yes, I am." The little girl says, with every confidence, "My daddy is coming and he will help you." So her dad comes and she says, "Daddy the lady's hair is stuck in the tree." Her dad starts laughing and comes over to unwrap my hair from the branches. I was ever so grateful!

Leave some for the flowers!

I was sitting in a restaurant. This restaurant has a wall that they can pull up when the weather is nice. They pulled up the wall and I was sitting on a table near the outside. This restaurant is in the produce area of my city. I am waiting for the waitress to come and it's pretty warm. A homeless guy walks up to one of the tables. There is a vase of flowers on each table. He stops at one table and grabs a vase. He takes the flowers out and drinks about half the water in the vase and sticks the flowers back in the vase and puts it back on the table. He left some for the flowers!

Rotten tomatoes!!

My ex's best friend was Mormon. When he was sent out for his period of converting people to Mormonism by going door to door, they put him in the toughest South Boston neighborhood. The area was all Italian and Irish Catholics. Our friend said that he would ride his bike through the neighborhood and the kids would save up rotten tomatoes and throw them into the spokes of his bike wheels. The rotten tomatoes would splatter up from the spokes all over him and his requisite white shirt. He said that they had excellent aim. He said he never made one Mormon convert in that neighborhood. He later became a missionary to South America, an easier crowd.


I heard the demonstrators coming today and I ran out to get my lunch before the main group got to the street in front of my workplace. I had to go to the ATM, so I ran to the bank and then I got my sandwich. The Cambodian lady at my favorite sandwich shop asks me what I think of the coming demonstrators and I tell her it's a good thing. Immigrants work hard and are under appreciated. She says she agrees. She herself works very hard at the shop and the owner takes advantage of her. I go outside and the crowd has arrived and I just get across the street and stop to watch the parade. Everybody is waving American flags and shouting, "Si se puede!" As the demonstrators pass the garbage can I am standing by, they put their empty water bottles in the trash, making sure the street is kept clean, very respectful. Much more respectful than most native born Americans that live in this city. I know it's time to go back to work and eat my lunch, but I can't leave. I stand and wave at all the demonstrators for an hour and a half. My co-worker comes and stands next to me, he's from China. We talk about how cool this march is compared to the anti-war marches he attends. He says the anarchists and Maoists always ruin the anti-war marches. He says he always confronts the Maoists, since he lived under the system and has no respect for Americans that think they know what it means although he has some admiration for Marxist theory. I tell him I think war can be useful some times and we discuss amongst ourselves for a bit. People in the march are asking us to march with them and we say we have to work. A girl walks by, very pregnant, and I point at her tummy, she yells, "Any day now!" I yell back, "Any minute!" I see one Cambodian guy, very few non Hispanics were marching, and the Cambodian guy has a scar on his neck that looks as if someone has tried to decapitate him at one time. I make eye contact with him and he nods. You can tell from looking into his eyes, that he has been to hell and back. My legs are shaking from emotion and my co-worker says his heart is pounding in his chest and he can't take it any more and has to leave. One of the top supervisors comes out to get lunch and sees me. She walks up and starts waving too. She says she wasn't sure what she could do until she saw me waving, so she came to wave with me. She used to run the adult literacy program and I taught reading under her for a while. She said she would always think of me when a guy would ask for a pretty white girl for a reading teacher. A light skinned hispanic guy rides up to us on a bike. He has a chihuahua in a basket on the back. He asks if we like Mexican food. The supervisor says "Yes," then the guy says, "Everybody likes Mexican food, but nobody likes Mexicans." I tell him that's not true. I stand and wave til all the marchers have passed and the low riders are honking as they drive past us. I am sunburned down one side of my body and on one side of my face.